Dan Semuanya Batal

Semua yang udah di rencanain, yang udah aku susun rapih, akhirnya batal. hahahha. Crazy right???
Ini sama kayak yang mama lakuin ke Mr. MH. Alasan’a RAS, setidaknya sedikit banyak.
Ga tau masih bisa sama dia ato gak, aku bingung.
Aku sedih karna batal, padahal udah nyiapin mental bener2, sekalipun baru kekumpul sekitar 20%, hahahha. Crazy decision.
Okey forget about that, yang sekarang aku rasain, i feel free, i feel there’s no reason for sad, bcoz what??? i realize that i still doubt.
i still love mr. MH, really2 love him,
semua yang berhubungan dengan Laki-Laki ku aku sangkut pautin sama dia.
Aku mulai ngerasa ga nyaman, mulai ngerasa This Is Not What I Want.
Mulai ngerasa jenuh,
Mulai ngerasa i wanna leave you all, and start my new life.
But i cant.
Aku udah terbiasa berdua, dan sekarang harus sendiri??
Aku manja??
Aku egois??
Maybe, i still labil, i realize that.
Oooh My GOD,
One problem again, my mom, should i hate her???
Of course no,
She is my MOM, my MOM,
But she’s not fair,
Aku cuman pengen nemuin kebahagiaan aku sendiri,
setelah sekian banyak masalah yang bisa bikin aku jadi gila kalo aku ga inget Allah.
Aku cuman pengen mama ngerti, aku sayang sama siapa.
but she’s not understand, maybe i’ve changed.
i know that. i’ve changed become worst.
i just wanna be my self, and love someone who i loved.
it’s complicated right???
Maulana Hasan, Dwi Aji Prasetyo, Sri Santi Sundari as my MOM.

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